I didn’t post yesterday due to Monday being a gargantuan challenge – the first day back at university. Yes, I kept leaving to take breaks to calm my anxiety in the first lecture – seven times to be precise. And yeah, so what I didn’t make it to my second lecture? I am incredibly proud of myself as I made it in to see my mentor Louise. That’s what’s important.
I had a mental breakdown in-front of Louise. It was the first time she’s ever seen me in such an agonizing state. The majority of that time, my pain seeped through as I spoke the incoherent language of madness. Louise is contacting the mental health services on my behalf, as apparently, I require anti-psychotics? Flowgression only depressingly skims on the surface of my suicidal ideation. I don’t want it to sink into the depths of another whining diary. I want to focus on fitness.
Talking of fitness, the gym is going incredibly well. Within the next 24 hours I will post the results of the first cycle of my gym routine. Maybe even some pictures to track progress? I think most would be surprised by my physique at present. Anyways, busy day ahead…
Peace out. xo